Court appearance on Monday, terrified, anxious and overwhelmed

[SMD]

I am in court on Monday, after blowing 72, I know I'm going to get a ban of around 18 months, but will take the DD course to get that reduced. My anxiety is off the charts, I'm not sleeping and I'm terrified that I will appear in the local paper, as I havent told anyone what has happened. I made a stupid, monumental mistake and am struggling to deal with the shame and guilt, as a DD conviction carries such a stigma.

I stupidly went with one of those specialist solicitors, as they told me what I wanted to hear and at the time I wasnt thinking straight, and now its too late to cancel them and get a refund. I have read many posts on here and just wish I had found it sooner.

The rational part of my brain tells me I will get through this, and will adapt to not driving over time, although it will be difficult. If I can get my ban reduced to around 13.5 months, I'm telling myself that it will pass quickly.

I am currently unemployed as I got made redundant last year, so I am now thinking that I will never get another job with a criminal conviction. I feel like my world has imploded and its all my own stupid fault.

I live on my own so dont feel like I have any support at the moment, although I am planning on telling some close friends. I just dont know how I am going to cope, or how I can get through 13 months of not driving and trying to keep that from people who know I drive, as well as trying to secure employment. I've then got the added pressure of what to do with my car, as I will need to find someone to transfer it to so I can get it insured in their name.

The long term effect of this is killing me at the moment.

Does anyone have any advice about getting employment, of has anyone got any experience of getting named in the local press? I have an abusive ex who doesnt know where I live, so if they name and shame me that info will be out there for everyone to see. I was thinking of asking my solicitor to speak to the press, if they are present, to explain my circumstances, but I am scared that will just peak their interest.

Also, as I havent told anyone, I dont have any character references, will this cause an issue? I will be writing a heartfelt apology, as I am truly remorseful and deeply ashamed. Its my first ever encounter with the police, and the DD incident didnt involve any accidents or 3rd parties.

As I'm currently unemployed, will the court want to know how much savings I have, so they can calculate the fine?

Any help, advise or wisdom would be very much appreciated

 

[Ashamedmumma]

Hi there, I blew 72 as well at the roadside, it was an awful experience for me, I know I shouldn’t have gone out but made the decision to. I could have easily killed someone or and this haunts me everyday.
My conviction date was 4/1/23 and they gave me an 18 month ban
I did the course with IAM roadsmart and they were absolutely amazing, the shame I felt in doing the course let alone the thoughts in my head about the whole thing were eased by the gentleman doing the course.
The course was harsh facts but at the same time made me rethink and relearn how drinking affects the body.
The ban was reduced by 4 months so in total I was off the road for just over 13 months.
You are not alone on here, the site has been amazing and everyone has been so so helpful.
We are all human and make mistakes, we learn from them
You will get over this and the shame and the pain you are feeling will ease over time.
Don’t be too hard on yourself, you are not the first and you won’t be the last.
The ban seems like eternity at first but myself using public transport gave me an insight to being a pedestrian so I have learnt a great deal through the whole experience
Do speak to people, they won’t be as judgmental as you think, you are probably doing that to yourself more
Kind regards

 

[Kashajuba]

I am in court on Monday, after blowing 72, I know I'm going to get a ban of around 18 months, but will take the DD course to get that reduced. My anxiety is off the charts, I'm not sleeping and I'm terrified that I will appear in the local paper, as I havent told anyone what has happened. I made a stupid, monumental mistake and am struggling to deal with the shame and guilt, as a DD conviction carries such a stigma.

I stupidly went with one of those specialist solicitors, as they told me what I wanted to hear and at the time I wasnt thinking straight, and now its too late to cancel them and get a refund. I have read many posts on here and just wish I had found it sooner.

The rational part of my brain tells me I will get through this, and will adapt to not driving over time, although it will be difficult. If I can get my ban reduced to around 13.5 months, I'm telling myself that it will pass quickly.

I am currently unemployed as I got made redundant last year, so I am now thinking that I will never get another job with a criminal conviction. I feel like my world has imploded and its all my own stupid fault.

I live on my own so dont feel like I have any support at the moment, although I am planning on telling some close friends. I just dont know how I am going to cope, or how I can get through 13 months of not driving and trying to keep that from people who know I drive, as well as trying to secure employment. I've then got the added pressure of what to do with my car, as I will need to find someone to transfer it to so I can get it insured in their name.

The long term effect of this is killing me at the moment.

Does anyone have any advice about getting employment, of has anyone got any experience of getting named in the local press? I have an abusive ex who doesnt know where I live, so if they name and shame me that info will be out there for everyone to see. I was thinking of asking my solicitor to speak to the press, if they are present, to explain my circumstances, but I am scared that will just peak their interest.

Also, as I havent told anyone, I dont have any character references, will this cause an issue? I will be writing a heartfelt apology, as I am truly remorseful and deeply ashamed. Its my first ever encounter with the police, and the DD incident didnt involve any accidents or 3rd parties.

As I'm currently unemployed, will the court want to know how much savings I have, so they can calculate the fine?

Any help, advise or wisdom would be very much appreciated

Brother iv been banned 8 times iv not bothered about it at least U will spare prison sentence

 

[SMD]

Hi there, I blew 72 as well at the roadside, it was an awful experience for me, I know I shouldn’t have gone out but made the decision to. I could have easily killed someone or and this haunts me everyday.
My conviction date was 4/1/23 and they gave me an 18 month ban
I did the course with IAM roadsmart and they were absolutely amazing, the shame I felt in doing the course let alone the thoughts in my head about the whole thing were eased by the gentleman doing the course.
The course was harsh facts but at the same time made me rethink and relearn how drinking affects the body.
The ban was reduced by 4 months so in total I was off the road for just over 13 months.
You are not alone on here, the site has been amazing and everyone has been so so helpful.
We are all human and make mistakes, we learn from them
You will get over this and the shame and the pain you are feeling will ease over time.
Don’t be too hard on yourself, you are not the first and you won’t be the last.
The ban seems like eternity at first but myself using public transport gave me an insight to being a pedestrian so I have learnt a great deal through the whole experience
Do speak to people, they won’t be as judgmental as you think, you are probably doing that to yourself more
Kind regards

Thank you for your kind words, I am crying reading this as I dont feel I'm worthy of any understanding, let alone forgiveness. I am just thankful that the only person impacted by this is me.

Do you take character references with you? Just wondering if I dont have them how much impact that will have. I am trying to face up to what I have done but then it all becomes very overwhelming and I just cant see any light at the end of the tunnel at the moment. I just cannot believe I have done something so reckless and for what? I've booked to see a therapist to try and help me cope with what I have done and what has happened, and to get help to deal with the next year or so. The night I got arrested was the single most stressful and shameful night of my life, and one that I will never repeat. Reading the posts on here has been very helpful, and seeing that people get through this and can carry on, I just hope I can get there too, at some point.

 

[nepal]

I am in court on Monday, after blowing 72, I know I'm going to get a ban of around 18 months, but will take the DD course to get that reduced. My anxiety is off the charts, I'm not sleeping and I'm terrified that I will appear in the local paper, as I havent told anyone what has happened. I made a stupid, monumental mistake and am struggling to deal with the shame and guilt, as a DD conviction carries such a stigma.

I stupidly went with one of those specialist solicitors, as they told me what I wanted to hear and at the time I wasnt thinking straight, and now its too late to cancel them and get a refund. I have read many posts on here and just wish I had found it sooner.

The rational part of my brain tells me I will get through this, and will adapt to not driving over time, although it will be difficult. If I can get my ban reduced to around 13.5 months, I'm telling myself that it will pass quickly.

I am currently unemployed as I got made redundant last year, so I am now thinking that I will never get another job with a criminal conviction. I feel like my world has imploded and its all my own stupid fault.

I live on my own so dont feel like I have any support at the moment, although I am planning on telling some close friends. I just dont know how I am going to cope, or how I can get through 13 months of not driving and trying to keep that from people who know I drive, as well as trying to secure employment. I've then got the added pressure of what to do with my car, as I will need to find someone to transfer it to so I can get it insured in their name.

The long term effect of this is killing me at the moment.

Does anyone have any advice about getting employment, of has anyone got any experience of getting named in the local press? I have an abusive ex who doesnt know where I live, so if they name and shame me that info will be out there for everyone to see. I was thinking of asking my solicitor to speak to the press, if they are present, to explain my circumstances, but I am scared that will just peak their interest.

Also, as I havent told anyone, I dont have any character references, will this cause an issue? I will be writing a heartfelt apology, as I am truly remorseful and deeply ashamed. Its my first ever encounter with the police, and the DD incident didnt involve any accidents or 3rd parties.

As I'm currently unemployed, will the court want to know how much savings I have, so they can calculate the fine?

Any help, advise or wisdom would be very much appreciated

First of all, live in the moment. Stop thinking the worst. If you think you will get a ban then you will.
If you get a fine they will ask you what you can afford. Don't be so hard on yourself. For all of us in this group there is a lesson in it for us.
This now becomes a game of patience.

By the way what advice did your solicitor give you?

 

[SMD]

First of all, live in the moment. Stop thinking the worst. If you think you will get a ban then you will.
If you get a fine they will ask you what you can afford. Don't be so hard on yourself. For all of us in this group there is a lesson in it for us.
This now becomes a game of patience.

By the way what advice did your solicitor give you?

It was one of those firms that said we can get you off on a technicality, and at the time I allowed myself to believe it because I was overwhelmed by the experience, but I have now instructed them that I am going with a guilty verdict, as I just want this over with, and the quicker I can start the ban, the quicker it will be over with.

 

[Sundog]

I’m sorry to hear about your woes.

I’m sure others will be along to tell you how it’ll all get easier. I’m sure others will tell you that the court date (and once that’s over, and you know where you stand) is the first milestone towards coming to terms with this, and is also that first important step in forgiving yourself. I’m also sure that others will tell you that you’re not alone. All of that is true.

What I’m here to tell you is that your career IS NOT OVER.

No-one would employ me after my DUI. Word got around fast, in (as the phrase goes) an incestuous industry, and once that word got out I’d get so far into the interview process and then… radio silence. Everyone thought I was damaged goods, and no one wanted to take a chance despite my track-record. Even people I’d known and trusted for years stepped back.

I’d been middle to high-level manager for a number of years and a director for at least the latter 3 or 4 of those. It was a steep cliff to fall off, and a long and lonely fall for me.

But - once I’d dried out - I dusted myself off, picked myself up again and I went out on my own.

And guess what, five years in (almost) and we’re doing seven figures and there are only three of us (there was one, just me when I started).

If industry growth continues then there will be five of us by summer (trying to recruit now). I have two patents (one pending and one granted), and all of a sudden everyone wants to work with me again. I don’t know how it all happened, and it has been a long journey I must admit, but one that only began to become real once I began to forgive and believe in me again.

This really isn’t the end. It’s just a setback, and perhaps even a change in direction. The way I see it now, my ‘Icarus moment’ (as I term it now) was almost inevitable. It’s always what you do in the face of a setback that counts more than the setback itself.

As said above, believe in you. I am living proof that - career-wise - there is life after a DUI conviction.

 

[nepal]

It was one of those firms that said we can get you off on a technicality, and at the time I allowed myself to believe it because I was overwhelmed by the experience, but I have now instructed them that I am going with a guilty verdict, as I just want this over with, and the quicker I can start the ban, the quicker it will be over with.

What advice did they give you? Are they going to be at court with you?

 

[Bad_karma]

I am in court on Monday, after blowing 72, I know I'm going to get a ban of around 18 months, but will take the DD course to get that reduced. My anxiety is off the charts, I'm not sleeping and I'm terrified that I will appear in the local paper, as I havent told anyone what has happened. I made a stupid, monumental mistake and am struggling to deal with the shame and guilt, as a DD conviction carries such a stigma.

I stupidly went with one of those specialist solicitors, as they told me what I wanted to hear and at the time I wasnt thinking straight, and now its too late to cancel them and get a refund. I have read many posts on here and just wish I had found it sooner.

The rational part of my brain tells me I will get through this, and will adapt to not driving over time, although it will be difficult. If I can get my ban reduced to around 13.5 months, I'm telling myself that it will pass quickly.

I am currently unemployed as I got made redundant last year, so I am now thinking that I will never get another job with a criminal conviction. I feel like my world has imploded and its all my own stupid fault.

I live on my own so dont feel like I have any support at the moment, although I am planning on telling some close friends. I just dont know how I am going to cope, or how I can get through 13 months of not driving and trying to keep that from people who know I drive, as well as trying to secure employment. I've then got the added pressure of what to do with my car, as I will need to find someone to transfer it to so I can get it insured in their name.

The long term effect of this is killing me at the moment.

Does anyone have any advice about getting employment, of has anyone got any experience of getting named in the local press? I have an abusive ex who doesnt know where I live, so if they name and shame me that info will be out there for everyone to see. I was thinking of asking my solicitor to speak to the press, if they are present, to explain my circumstances, but I am scared that will just peak their interest.

Also, as I havent told anyone, I dont have any character references, will this cause an issue? I will be writing a heartfelt apology, as I am truly remorseful and deeply ashamed. Its my first ever encounter with the police, and the DD incident didnt involve any accidents or 3rd parties.

As I'm currently unemployed, will the court want to know how much savings I have, so they can calculate the fine?

Any help, advise or wisdom would be very much appreciated

In terms of getting a job I wouldn’t panic. In an old job I was told on one occasion to reject a candidate for a job based on the fact he had a drink driving conviction. Although when I have been the one disclosing my convictions, I have been incredibly surprised at just how accepting my previous employers were and I personally have never had an issue. I was even cleared to work in schools a few years after being convicted for drink and dangerous driving as well as other offences.

I’m unsure what you do but assuming it’s just a “normal” profession, simply say you have a “motoring conviction” - I doubt most places will even ask you about it. You may miss out on the odd opportunity but overall I would say the amount of people willing to look past it and give you a second chance is a lot higher than what you might think it is.

It may be in the paper, it may not. Buy a copy of your local paper and flick through it to see if they’re blanket printing all court appearances or not. If you’re in a large city, you’re significantly less likely to feature than if you live in a rural area. Although having said that, even if you do, it’s going to be a one liner somewhere on page 26, it’s not going to be front page and I would doubt anyone will even pay it much attention anyway. I don’t know anyone who reads my local paper

 

[justanotherone]

I am in court on Monday, after blowing 72, I know I'm going to get a ban of around 18 months, but will take the DD course to get that reduced. My anxiety is off the charts, I'm not sleeping and I'm terrified that I will appear in the local paper, as I havent told anyone what has happened. I made a stupid, monumental mistake and am struggling to deal with the shame and guilt, as a DD conviction carries such a stigma.

I stupidly went with one of those specialist solicitors, as they told me what I wanted to hear and at the time I wasnt thinking straight, and now its too late to cancel them and get a refund. I have read many posts on here and just wish I had found it sooner.

The rational part of my brain tells me I will get through this, and will adapt to not driving over time, although it will be difficult. If I can get my ban reduced to around 13.5 months, I'm telling myself that it will pass quickly.

I am currently unemployed as I got made redundant last year, so I am now thinking that I will never get another job with a criminal conviction. I feel like my world has imploded and its all my own stupid fault.

I live on my own so dont feel like I have any support at the moment, although I am planning on telling some close friends. I just dont know how I am going to cope, or how I can get through 13 months of not driving and trying to keep that from people who know I drive, as well as trying to secure employment. I've then got the added pressure of what to do with my car, as I will need to find someone to transfer it to so I can get it insured in their name.

The long term effect of this is killing me at the moment.

Does anyone have any advice about getting employment, of has anyone got any experience of getting named in the local press? I have an abusive ex who doesnt know where I live, so if they name and shame me that info will be out there for everyone to see. I was thinking of asking my solicitor to speak to the press, if they are present, to explain my circumstances, but I am scared that will just peak their interest.

Also, as I havent told anyone, I dont have any character references, will this cause an issue? I will be writing a heartfelt apology, as I am truly remorseful and deeply ashamed. Its my first ever encounter with the police, and the DD incident didnt involve any accidents or 3rd parties.

As I'm currently unemployed, will the court want to know how much savings I have, so they can calculate the fine?

Any help, advise or wisdom would be very much appreciated

Been exactly where you are.

Made the same decision to go with these so called "specialist drink driving solicitors", and I'll tell you now, they're full of shit.
They will tell you all sorts on the phone and say everything you want to here and make you start to believe you will get away with this.

They persuaded me to plead not guilty which is what I did when I got to court, but just before I went into the courtroom, the barrister they sent told me that I had no liable defence and should plead guilty. Was furious at this as I'd paid over 2.5k for them to represent me and also I had driven to court that day. I pleaded not guilty and left court, next contact I had with them was them wanting another £5,500, without giving me any indication of how exactly I could get out of this.
At that point I realised I was wasting time and money. Cut all strings with them and went in on my own the second time, no duty solicitor allowed as it was the second time I was appearing.

Pleaded guilty, got a 16 month ban (Down to 12 with DD course) and a £730 fine.

Went home, got changed and went out for some food with a friend and it was like everything was normal again, with the exception of being banned from driving. Felt so much better that it was all done.

My point is your best bet is always to plead guilty and get it over with, you will feel so much better once its done. Do the course as soon as possible and get that out the way too. And like you say the sooner the ban starts the sooner it ends. Feels like a very recent event in my life and all of a sudden I only have 12 weeks left on my ban, after that my life will be back to normal (With the exception of the criminal record for 10 years), but that's not the end of the world.

The possibility of appearing in the paper seems 50/50 to me. I was terrified of this too. Lucky for me I didn't, and on my DD course they asked for show of hands who appeared in the paper and it was only about half the course said they did.

Good luck in court and don't forget to show remorse

 

[SMD]

Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to respond, it really is appreciated. Life seems very daunting at the moment, I just hope I have some of the courage and resilience that people on here have shown.

I cannot believe how taken in I was when I initially contacted the 'specialist' solicitors, they just told me what I wanted to hear, and as I was in such a state at the time I chose to believe them. It has taken me a couple of weeks to try and get my head around the situation but I am so thankful that I have found this forum. I just wish that the 'lightbulb moment' had gone off earlier so I would be in a better position ahead of my court case, as I'm now scrambling to get things done before Monday.

I'm currently on that rollercoaster of emotions, going from utter despair and panic to almost catatonic. I've tried to avoid people and going outside, but when I do see friends they are commenting on how down I seem, but I'm just not ready to share what has happened yet, I feel that I have 'disappeared' as a person and just hope at some point I can turn that around.

I dont know if its denial or a coping mechanism, but when I think of the next 12-18 months I have to try and tell myself that I will get through it, otherwise I start to spiral and the anxiety / shame / guilt / terror becomes totally overwhelming, and I've started to have panic attacks that I have never before experienced.

The thought of going to court is terrifying, but from the comments I've read, everyone is saying its not as bad as you think it will be, I'm just dreading having to listen to the evidence from that night.

I live in a fairly large town, circa 212k population, and have looked through the last ten years of 'crime' reporting on the local newspaper site, it seems that they report DD offences when there are other factors, i.e. crash, people injured, police chase, 4 x times the limit, repeat offenders, motorway, etc, so I'm just praying that as mine has no other mitigating factors then it wont get reported, or its a 'busy' week for news reports, but thats out of my control, and if it happens I will just have to deal with it.

Once again, thank you for your comments, insights, advise and compassion. This has felt like a very lonely time for me, but to find a safe space where other people have experienced the same thing, and are going through the exact same situation / emotions has really helped and for that I am truly thankful.

 

[Xeronema]

I live in a fairly large town, circa 212k population, and have looked through the last ten years of 'crime' reporting on the local newspaper site, it seems that they report DD offences when there are other factors, i.e. crash, people injured, police chase, 4 x times the limit, repeat offenders, motorway, etc,

That's usually the case.

My first DR10 wasn't in the paper, I don't think it was anyway. My second was, as I rolled my car several times after swerving out of the way of a lorry that came onto my side of the road. I was rather unlucky as my house was the only one on my road. No one ever approached me or said anything. My opinion at the time was that so many people get caught for drink driving, all the basic traffic stops with no drama just blend into one and is so boring they just don't bother reporting it (unless it's a slow news days, as others have already mentioned).

I wish you the best of luck.

 

[Want to end it all]

I am in court on Monday, after blowing 72, I know I'm going to get a ban of around 18 months, but will take the DD course to get that reduced. My anxiety is off the charts, I'm not sleeping and I'm terrified that I will appear in the local paper, as I havent told anyone what has happened. I made a stupid, monumental mistake and am struggling to deal with the shame and guilt, as a DD conviction carries such a stigma.

I stupidly went with one of those specialist solicitors, as they told me what I wanted to hear and at the time I wasnt thinking straight, and now its too late to cancel them and get a refund. I have read many posts on here and just wish I had found it sooner.

The rational part of my brain tells me I will get through this, and will adapt to not driving over time, although it will be difficult. If I can get my ban reduced to around 13.5 months, I'm telling myself that it will pass quickly.

I am currently unemployed as I got made redundant last year, so I am now thinking that I will never get another job with a criminal conviction. I feel like my world has imploded and its all my own stupid fault.

I live on my own so dont feel like I have any support at the moment, although I am planning on telling some close friends. I just dont know how I am going to cope, or how I can get through 13 months of not driving and trying to keep that from people who know I drive, as well as trying to secure employment. I've then got the added pressure of what to do with my car, as I will need to find someone to transfer it to so I can get it insured in their name.

The long term effect of this is killing me at the moment.

Does anyone have any advice about getting employment, of has anyone got any experience of getting named in the local press? I have an abusive ex who doesnt know where I live, so if they name and shame me that info will be out there for everyone to see. I was thinking of asking my solicitor to speak to the press, if they are present, to explain my circumstances, but I am scared that will just peak their interest.

Also, as I havent told anyone, I dont have any character references, will this cause an issue? I will be writing a heartfelt apology, as I am truly remorseful and deeply ashamed. Its my first ever encounter with the police, and the DD incident didnt involve any accidents or 3rd parties.

As I'm currently unemployed, will the court want to know how much savings I have, so they can calculate the fine?

Any help, advise or wisdom would be very much appreciated

Hello I just wanted to message as I have been where you are back in November and I know how it feels like the end of the world. Hence my name I really thought it was. I blew much higher than you (102) and had a 22 month ban , I’ve done the course now which has reduced it (and dare I say the course was fun! ) but it still felt and feels a
Life time! Like you I was absolutely terrified of being in the paper, I am quite well known in my town and respected because of my job and I have a family bigish social media presence, because of this I was certain the paper would use this against me as I have been in the paper for positive things before. I couldn’t sleep and was checking the paper literally all day every day refreshing in a pit of despair luckily I was never in the paper other than the court roundup which I’m fairly sure no one ever reads, I’ve got an unusual name so everyone would know its
Me and no one’s ever mentioned it. So I would be surprised if you at such a smaller reading were in the paper.

I know it feels like the world is ending and you’ll never feel happy again but honestly you will, once the court is over you will feel a sense of relief and for me i then thought right im
Going to make a plan and get through this. I have been walking every where and last week clocked 40 miles! I’ve never felt so fit and healthy, I’ve been trying and failing to lose weight for years and nothing ever works and at last my body is changing and I can see the benefits. Because I’m walking more it’s made me feel so much healthier and happier and positive inside , im
Eating better, im
A nicer person to be around, all of this is because I lost my license. It’s crazy but I have been determined to turn it around to a positive. It could of been so much worse I didn’t kill
Anyone and now I know I’ll never ever risk anything so stupid again, and I also when I get my license back will still continue to walk more as I am loving it.
The work side of things for me probably is easier in some ways as I am self employed and my job isn’t a Monday to Friday 9-5 but I do need to get lifts quite regularly I am lucky my mum and husband have been so good and supportive and happy to help me where I need it. Unless you are looking for a driving job I don’t see how one silly
Mistake will stop you getting a job, just keep looking and you will find something.

I’ve babbled on a bit there but I just wanted to let you know as if you look at my posts before I’ve been in some dark places because of my conviction but I now am out the other side and even though next June when it ends feels so long away I am just focusing on how healthy and fit I am going to be by then,Concentrating on that gives me a purpose and makes me know I can get through it and it’s ok, it will be ok I promise xx

 

[jamesbrown1]

Hello I just wanted to message as I have been where you are back in November and I know how it feels like the end of the world. Hence my name I really thought it was. I blew much higher than you (102) and had a 22 month ban , I’ve done the course now which has reduced it (and dare I say the course was fun! ) but it still felt and feels a
Life time! Like you I was absolutely terrified of being in the paper, I am quite well known in my town and respected because of my job and I have a family bigish social media presence, because of this I was certain the paper would use this against me as I have been in the paper for positive things before. I couldn’t sleep and was checking the paper literally all day every day refreshing in a pit of despair luckily I was never in the paper other than the court roundup which I’m fairly sure no one ever reads, I’ve got an unusual name so everyone would know its
Me and no one’s ever mentioned it. So I would be surprised if you at such a smaller reading were in the paper.

I know it feels like the world is ending and you’ll never feel happy again but honestly you will, once the court is over you will feel a sense of relief and for me i then thought right im
Going to make a plan and get through this. I have been walking every where and last week clocked 40 miles! I’ve never felt so fit and healthy, I’ve been trying and failing to lose weight for years and nothing ever works and at last my body is changing and I can see the benefits. Because I’m walking more it’s made me feel so much healthier and happier and positive inside , im
Eating better, im
A nicer person to be around, all of this is because I lost my license. It’s crazy but I have been determined to turn it around to a positive. It could of been so much worse I didn’t kill
Anyone and now I know I’ll never ever risk anything so stupid again, and I also when I get my license back will still continue to walk more as I am loving it.
The work side of things for me probably is easier in some ways as I am self employed and my job isn’t a Monday to Friday 9-5 but I do need to get lifts quite regularly I am lucky my mum and husband have been so good and supportive and happy to help me where I need it. Unless you are looking for a driving job I don’t see how one silly
Mistake will stop you getting a job, just keep looking and you will find something.

I’ve babbled on a bit there but I just wanted to let you know as if you look at my posts before I’ve been in some dark places because of my conviction but I now am out the other side and even though next June when it ends feels so long away I am just focusing on how healthy and fit I am going to be by then,Concentrating on that gives me a purpose and makes me know I can get through it and it’s ok, it will be ok I promise xx

good to see how well you are doing, hopefully will be a big help to SMD. I really think, in cases like this the forum can be invaluable.

 

[Want to end it all]

good to see how well you are doing, hopefully will be a big help to SMD. I really think, in cases like this the forum can be invaluable.

I totally agree I wouldn’t of got through it without this forum x

 

[Want to end it all]

I also wanted to say I have been turning down lifts when offered as “I actually prefer walking and getting the exercise”. This ban has honestly stopped me being so lazy

 

[Bad_karma]

I have been turning down lifts when offered as “I actually prefer walking and getting the exercise”.

I was the exact same during my ban. I would turn down lifts as I thoroughly enjoyed walking around - especially in the better weather and listening to some music. It made me feel emboldened that despite not having my licence I was still getting where I needed to go - it wasn’t stopping me - and I was even enjoying the journey more

 

[SMD]

I keep re-reading everyones comments as they are so positive, and I'm trying to get my head around whats happened but I'm currently in crisis mode and the panic and anxiety just keep rising. I'm an over-thinker at the best of times so this is just taking it to the next level. I just dont know how I'm going to cope, or live with the shame of what I have done. This weekend I'm planning on telling a couple of close friends, but the thought of that is making me sick. Part of me doesnt want to be here and face the reality of the situation, as it doesnt feel survivable at the moment, but another part of me is saying that I can get through this and come out the other side (again, dont know if this is denial or a coping mechanism). I know I have to try and forgive myself at some point, otherwise I'll never be able to cope, but I just dont know how I will be able to do that as it feels wrong at the moment.

Honestly, I cannot believe how supportive people on here have been, this site seems to be the one thing that is keeping me going at the moment, so thank you all for being lovely human beings. xx

 

[Xeronema]

I keep re-reading everyones comments as they are so positive, and I'm trying to get my head around whats happened but I'm currently in crisis mode and the panic and anxiety just keep rising. I'm an over-thinker at the best of times so this is just taking it to the next level. I just dont know how I'm going to cope, or live with the shame of what I have done. This weekend I'm planning on telling a couple of close friends, but the thought of that is making me sick. Part of me doesnt want to be here and face the reality of the situation, as it doesnt feel survivable at the moment, but another part of me is saying that I can get through this and come out the other side (again, dont know if this is denial or a coping mechanism). I know I have to try and forgive myself at some point, otherwise I'll never be able to cope, but I just dont know how I will be able to do that as it feels wrong at the moment.

Honestly, I cannot believe how supportive people on here have been, this site seems to be the one thing that is keeping me going at the moment, so thank you all for being lovely human beings. xx

Most of us went through the same feelings.

I've been convicted twice for drink driving. First time in 2004 (I think it was 2004) and then again in 2011. It matters so little to me now that I don't even think about it, other than when replying to comments on this forum. You'll come to forgive yourself, after a while you'll have more important things in your life to worry about that will take over from constantly feeling bad about it.

After a while you'll stop feeling bad about what you did and you'll be more focused on the rest of your life. Then when you get back on the road, after your disqualification, you'll realise just how stressful driving is, again (or that may just be me lol).

 

[Want to end it all]

I keep re-reading everyones comments as they are so positive, and I'm trying to get my head around whats happened but I'm currently in crisis mode and the panic and anxiety just keep rising. I'm an over-thinker at the best of times so this is just taking it to the next level. I just dont know how I'm going to cope, or live with the shame of what I have done. This weekend I'm planning on telling a couple of close friends, but the thought of that is making me sick. Part of me doesnt want to be here and face the reality of the situation, as it doesnt feel survivable at the moment, but another part of me is saying that I can get through this and come out the other side (again, dont know if this is denial or a coping mechanism). I know I have to try and forgive myself at some point, otherwise I'll never be able to cope, but I just dont know how I will be able to do that as it feels wrong at the moment.

Honestly, I cannot believe how supportive people on here have been, this site seems to be the one thing that is keeping me going at the moment, so thank you all for being lovely human beings. xx

I completely understand I have been there, look back on my posts click on my name and you’ll see I was down a dark hole I saw no way out I thought I wanted to end it all. Hence the name. But I honestly promise you you will get through this, you will be happy again xx