Loneliness after conviction

Convicted Driver Insurance

AndyJG

Well-known member
I have been retired 19 years now so I am almost ‘normal’…….
Over 30 years ago. I happened to be (drinking) pals with the retired lead detective of the "bible john" investigations,a retired governor of the "Bar L",and the local police desk sergeant.....great people with great life experiences......your input on here is up there with them...many thanks..
 

Hds112

Member
Circumstances were that I drank heavily the night before, woke up in the morning with some bad thoughts running around my head, got in my car and drove home. One of my colleagues at the time had said he took my keys off me and gave them back in the morning, which wasn’t true and was used as aggravation. I’ve been placed on the barred list for Policing and will be able to appeal this once my conviction is spent. I’ve learned a lot in regards to dealing with my emotions so it isn’t all negative, but as has been said it’s early days! I’m going to University to study criminology in September so you’re definitely right about the option to go into things around policing. Thanks again for all the replies
 

Hayesy

Member
I was convicted 1 month ago. When I was convicted I was training to be a police officer. I’ve lost my job, reputation and the respect of everyone I love or who loves me. I’m really struggling to find a way out of the hole I’ve put myself in, and have tried suicide. It obviously failed and I’ll never try to do it again, I just want to know how people came to terms with becoming a criminal
My friend I was a serving police officer of 3 years following 10 years service as a prison officer. I was disqualified, fined and put on tag for 4 months. Lost my home, family, career and reputation simply because of a domestic that went massively wrong. There were times where I wanted to end it all but I just had to change my perspective on life and its made me a better person. Now I have a thriving career in health and safety, and an ambition to become a stand up comedian. You will get through it I promise. If you ever want to drop me a message, feel free.
 

Polly3

Well-known member
Circumstances were that I drank heavily the night before, woke up in the morning with some bad thoughts running around my head, got in my car and drove home. One of my colleagues at the time had said he took my keys off me and gave them back in the morning, which wasn’t true and was used as aggravation. I’ve been placed on the barred list for Policing and will be able to appeal this once my conviction is spent. I’ve learned a lot in regards to dealing with my emotions so it isn’t all negative, but as has been said it’s early days! I’m going to University to study criminology in September so you’re definitely right about the option to go into things around policing. Thanks again for all the replies
The Probation Service offers an excellent career and your conviction would be no bar to that .
 

simondo72

Active member
Am I the only one who sees this as it is, or have I missed a meeting? A trainee Police officer, who could be arresting someone for drink driving and all that entails for that person, has themselves been convicted and worse, a colleague (another Police officer) lies, in some attempt to cover up the crime.
Sorry that you feel like you do, because no-one should feel suicidal, but do you not see the hypocrisy of the position? All the feelings you describe apply equally to many on this forum, who have/had jobs they loved and families to support etc.
I certainly do not want to compound your feelings, because you need to find a way forward, which looking on this thread I feel you may have discovered, but a lot of other people, who were not training to be in law enforcement, have been given some tough love on here.
I am not anti Police, because I was guilty as charged, but my conviction meant I lost my job instantly. The Police officer who arrested me was super nice to me and the custody sergeant said, not every one who stands infront of me is a criminal; and then offered me some leaflets that provided counselling and support. I was faced with the very real prospect of losing my home and not being able to support my family. That was my fault and I have faced this head on. The world is a better place with you in it, than not. You have a whole life to live.
Go to Uni, as it is a great experience and opens doors you can't imagine now, make your life the best it can be. You will always remember what happened and hopefully it makes you a better person in future. You can't change the past, but you can influence the future. I wish you well and there is a bright light at the end of the tunnel, so go and embrace it.
 
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price1367

TTC Group
Simondo72, I understand the sentiments of what you have written, but have revisited what has been said and I fail to understand the comment: “ and worse, a colleague (another Police officer) lies, in some attempt to cover up the crime.”
Where do you get this from?
I can only think that it relates to the poster saying that the prosecution did not mention that he was a trainee police officer or that he drove 30 miles. You have to understand that the ‘prosecution’ is NOT the police, it is the independent Crown Prosecution Service that presented the case in court and it is up to them what relevant facts are put to the magistrates. The court itself will generally ask a persons occupation, a persons job is not relevant to the allegation of drink driving. Whilst the poster may have driven 30 miles, unless he admitted this to the police - they have no proof of this unless they followed him for 30 miles, which is highly doubtful.
Even then, the Crown Prosecution Service did not lie. There is a distinct difference between not mentioning some ‘facts’ and Actually saying something that is a lie. So if they had said “the defendant drove for a mile” whilst the case papers show that the defendant had stated that he drove 30 miles then that is a lie. Saying “the defendant was seen driving with no lights on in Smith Terrace and was stopped by Constable Bloggs” even if the defendant did mention at some point how far he drove (did he in fact tell the police that or is he just telling us?) is not a lie. The CPS decide what they want to present as a SUMMARY of the offence. Full details of what happened don’t appear unless there is a not guilty plea and a trial ensures.
I will knock the police on here if they appear to have done something wrong but on this occasion your comments are unfair and, further than that, downright wrong.
 

simondo72

Active member
Hi Price, to clarify the OP states that a colleague at the time said he took the keys (which it later turns out he didn't) and that became an aggravating factor. I read this as a fellow trainee, or qualified Police Officer and not the CPS etc.
Simondo72, I understand the sentiments of what you have written, but have revisited what has been said and I fail to understand the comment: “ and worse, a colleague (another Police officer) lies, in some attempt to cover up the crime.”
Where do you get this from?
I can only think that it relates to the poster saying that the prosecution did not mention that he was a trainee police officer or that he drove 30 miles. You have to understand that the ‘prosecution’ is NOT the police, it is the independent Crown Prosecution Service that presented the case in court and it is up to them what relevant facts are put to the magistrates. The court itself will generally ask a persons occupation, a persons job is not relevant to the allegation of drink driving. Whilst the poster may have driven 30 miles, unless he admitted this to the police - they have no proof of this unless they followed him for 30 miles, which is highly doubtful.
Even then, the Crown Prosecution Service did not lie. There is a distinct difference between not mentioning some ‘facts’ and Actually saying something that is a lie. So if they had said “the defendant drove for a mile” whilst the case papers show that the defendant had stated that he drove 30 miles then that is a lie. Saying “the defendant was seen driving with no lights on in Smith Terrace and was stopped by Constable Bloggs” even if the defendant did mention at some point how far he drove (did he in fact tell the police that or is he just telling us?) is not a lie. The CPS decide what they want to present as a SUMMARY of the offence. Full details of what happened don’t appear unless there is a not guilty plea and a trial ensures.
I will knock the police on here if they appear to have done something wrong but on this occasion your comments are unfair and, further than that, downright wrong.
 

price1367

TTC Group
Hi Price, to clarify the OP states that a colleague at the time said he took the keys (which it later turns out he didn't) and that became an aggravating factor. I read this as a fellow trainee, or qualified Police Officer and not the CPS etc.
Ok, I can see the part that you referred to now and it wasn’t anything to do with CPS: “ One of my colleagues at the time had said he took my keys off me and gave them back in the morning, which wasn’t true and was used as aggravation. ” It does not say it was a police officer, it could have been anyone, but perhaps a fellow trainee, BUT, the poster says it was “used as aggravation” so it wasn’t trying to ‘cover up a crime’ it was allegedly used to make his drink drive situation seem worse.
I find it strange that this would be told to the court, but with no mention of the context of his occupation as a trainee police officer, presumably on a residential course?
Anyway, this case shows that the police do not cover for each other. He was a trainee police officer, caught drink driving by the police and held accountable, as he should.
 

Jo88

Well-known member
I am two years post arrest, coming up to two years court in November (I had to wait months to hear as blood results delayed) & back driving. I think looking back it is about small steps so some tips that helped me
A) one day at a time, plan short term
B) you will find out who true friends are
C) it becomes old news for most - I still have one set of local neighbours who treat me very differently but that’s it - tbh am I bothered !
D) find out what helps you - to me it was journaling writing everything down, writing letters that were never sent to people I wanted to say sorry to & also those who I had a hard time with - couple of friends who gave me a tough time but didn’t have energy to say how they made me feel. And to the awful Sargent at the police station who said I may go to prison - ( which I now know was incredibly unlikely) writing helped I later burned them all
E) a close friend gave me massive support - talking helped me
F) work were good added issue of professional investigation but once over all ok but I have moved to a low profile — I hit the press post court big style due to my job etc & we do a lot of thing that get in the media - not now I keep a low profile -
G) taken up new things - I guess a bit of reinvention I’m carful re what i say re my job etc if anyone asks me
But having a stock answer helps & if you fast ask people about themselves —
One thing I still do is focus on gratitude- the little things a Robin in the garden, a flower etc & trying to get outside for walks etc

Those who love you will still be there , those who are not true will vanish - good
Plan small things & see what other jobs you can do or some volunteer work
It’s one small mistake in life & you survive But don’t let it define you as I am sure if you make a list of all the positives they are bigger than DD
Walk tall
 

Jo88

Well-known member
Hope you feel ok. What were your readings? Did you any community work? Were u involved in a accident? I have 112 at breathalizer which is very high, thinking to get a solicitor too. I know I will be banned for driving and it’s fine, but this is my 1st ofence in my life, I study finance and accountancy which I’ll probably have to give up, mother of 2.. i am scared of going prison. I will be working from home so work should be fine, as not work related ofence, but jail…😥😥😥😥
 

Reets

Well-known member
Hope you feel ok. What were your readings? Did you any community work? Were u involved in a accident? I have 112 at breathalizer which is very high, thinking to get a solicitor too. I know I will be banned for driving and it’s fine, but this is my 1st ofence in my life, I study finance and accountancy which I’ll probably have to give up, mother of 2.. i am scared of going prison. I will be working from home so work should be fine, as not work related ofence, but jail…😥😥😥😥
Probably looking at 18m, 45-80hrs community service, court fine and fees.
 

price1367

TTC Group
Hope you feel ok. What were your readings? Did you any community work? Were u involved in a accident? I have 112 at breathalizer which is very high, thinking to get a solicitor too. I know I will be banned for driving and it’s fine, but this is my 1st ofence in my life, I study finance and accountancy which I’ll probably have to give up, mother of 2.. i am scared of going prison. I will be working from home so work should be fine, as not work related ofence, but jail…😥😥😥😥
You will not go to prison for a reading of 112, the threshold for custody is 120 or above, even then, for an uncomplicated (no accident) case that high prison is seldom used, especially for a first time offence.
 

stu12341234

Well-known member
You will not go to prison for a reading of 112, the threshold for custody is 120 or above, even then, for an uncomplicated (no accident) case that high prison is seldom used, especially for a first time offence.
Hi,

You will not go to prison! Price is true too his word.

It is a terrible feeling....believe me, I know exactly how it does feel. (No sleep, Do not want to eat, Staying in bed if possible & just letting it go round & round in your mind i.e rumination) But support is here.

Be Safe.
 
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Jo88

Well-known member
Hi,

You will not go to prison! Price is true too his word.

It is a terrible feeling....believe me, I know exactly how it does feel. (No sleep, Do not want to eat, Staying in bed if possible & just letting it go round & round in your mind i.e rumination) But support is here.

Be Safe.
I am scared if social services. Nearly 2 years ago a ended up in AE for drinking too much :(
Hi,

You will not go to prison! Price is true too his word.

It is a terrible feeling....believe me, I know exactly how it does feel. (No sleep, Do not want to eat, Staying in bed if possible & just letting it go round & round in your mind i.e rumination) But support is here.

Be Safe.
 

Polly3

Well-known member
You will not go to prison for a reading of 112, the threshold for custody is 120 or above, even then, for an uncomplicated (no accident) case that high prison is seldom used, especially for a first time offence.
As ever Price is the person to listen to . If I may add a bit : I spent much of my career on the front line delivering services to the Courts . You will not go to prison . Moreover , it is not a given that you will even get Community Payback work to do . You will continue to feel anxious until it’s dealt with but please get the thought of prison out of your mind
 

Hds112

Member
Am I the only one who sees this as it is, or have I missed a meeting? A trainee Police officer, who could be arresting someone for drink driving and all that entails for that person, has themselves been convicted and worse, a colleague (another Police officer) lies, in some attempt to cover up the crime.
Sorry that you feel like you do, because no-one should feel suicidal, but do you not see the hypocrisy of the position? All the feelings you describe apply equally to many on this forum, who have/had jobs they loved and families to support etc.
I certainly do not want to compound your feelings, because you need to find a way forward, which looking on this thread I feel you may have discovered, but a lot of other people, who were not training to be in law enforcement, have been given some tough love on here.
I am not anti Police, because I was guilty as charged, but my conviction meant I lost my job instantly. The Police officer who arrested me was super nice to me and the custody sergeant said, not every one who stands infront of me is a criminal; and then offered me some leaflets that provided counselling and support. I was faced with the very real prospect of losing my home and not being able to support my family. That was my fault and I have faced this head on. The world is a better place with you in it, than not. You have a whole life to live.
Go to Uni, as it is a great experience and opens doors you can't imagine now, make your life the best it can be. You will always remember what happened and hopefully it makes you a better person in future. You can't change the past, but you can influence the future. I wish you well and there is a bright light at the end of the tunnel, so go and embrace it.
Hiya,

I completely understand what you’re saying and agree with you. There’s a clear level of hypocrisy looking at the situation. The reality is I had only just the day before started learning how to handcuff people. The aggravation was used in a gross misconduct hearing and not in the court room, I should have made that more clear. In response to another comment my breath reading was 77, end my ban is 17 months with a reduction from the course.

I’m in a much better place since writing this and appreciate the comments. All of them are constructive which is a great advocate for using this page. Wish everyone all the best.
 

Hayesy

Member
Hope you feel ok. What were your readings? Did you any community work? Were u involved in a accident? I have 112 at breathalizer which is very high, thinking to get a solicitor too. I know I will be banned for driving and it’s fine, but this is my 1st ofence in my life, I study finance and accountancy which I’ll probably have to give up, mother of 2.. i am scared of going prison. I will be working from home so work should be fine, as not work related ofence, but jail…😥😥😥😥

Hope you feel ok. What were your readings? Did you any community work? Were u involved in a accident? I have 112 at breathalizer which is very high, thinking to get a solicitor too. I know I will be banned for driving and it’s fine, but this is my 1st ofence in my life, I study finance and accountancy which I’ll probably have to give up, mother of 2.. i am scared of going prison. I will be working from home so work should be fine, as not work related ofence, but
I am scared if social services. Nearly 2 years ago a ended up in AE for drinking too much :(
Firstly don't beat yourself up. Mistakes happen and you will pay the price for it. I lost everything through my own fault, paid the price but learnt a lot about myself. It sounds like you may need to make some changes to your life too, so make it happen. You will not go to prison. I blew 100 and had driving without due care and failing to stop on my charge sheet. I got 20 month ban, £650 fine and 4 months on tag. This all happened nearly 4 years ago and managed to change my life massively. My advice is to appreciate what you have around you, have a serious look at your drinking habits and accept what happened. I'm every job interview I have been honest about what happened and people have been extremely supportive. They respect honesty. With regards to social services, if they get involved then you need to show that you are looking seriously in to your failings and rectifying. I don't believe they will be involved too much though as they, like many other public services, are stretched to the max.
 

Jo88

Well-known member
Thank you for your kind words. I am actually away this weekend and both my eldest and my husband are trying to cheer me up and I have to fight for them now. it will change my life massively. Luckly, work are ok with me continuing to WFM, so this is good. What is due care and failing to stop? I may have drove without due care too…but I’ll have to wait for the charge. X
 

price1367

TTC Group
Thank you for your kind words. I am actually away this weekend and both my eldest and my husband are trying to cheer me up and I have to fight for them now. it will change my life massively. Luckly, work are ok with me continuing to WFM, so this is good. What is due care and failing to stop? I may have drove without due care too…but I’ll have to wait for the charge. X
If you are involved in an accident where damage or injury is caused then you must stop, and give your name and address to anyone who has the need for them. In the case of personal injury then you must give your insurance details.
If you are unable to do this then you must report the accident to the police asap, and in any case within 24 hours. (Reporting it later because it suits you does not absolve your duty to stop and give your name and address)
Due care and attention is harder to define, but amounts to your driving falling below the standards required of a reasonable driver, resulting in an accident or inconvenience to other road users.
 
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