Help and advice

[Sillylivvy]

Hi I am new. Had a very bad experience this weekend. Had a fight with my abusive now glad to say ex partner and he threw me out of the house in my pj’s at 4am. I had far too much to drink and ashamed to say I got in my car.
I was caught after I hit a kerb badly doing massive damage to my car and a neighbour heard the commotion. So now I am in court on 16th October. I blew 79.
Can anyone give me some words of advice, support, wisdom as to what I can expect as I am seriously scared and freaking out completely about it.
I know I am stupid and am so ashamed of myself. I can’t believe that this has happened.
Thanks.

 

[TipsyNurse]

Hi,

Don't be hard on your self, it sounds like a deeply unpleasant and stressful situation and we all make poor decisions in those circumstances.

How far did you drive before you crashed? There is a defence to DD if you only drove far enough to get away from a violent situation, but it only applies to short distances - usually less than a mile - as you are meant to stop driving as soon as you are safe. As you crashed it would be hugely advantageous if you told the police you were driving to get away from your ex on the night.

Otherwise normally you would get about a two year ban with that reading but magistrates are human and if you explain the situation, ideally with the report of domestic violence you made to the police or a written statement from a friend confirming the situation, magistrates can give a more lenient sentence, often the minimum twelve month ban. Unfortunately they must ban you unless you have the defence above.

If it's any help escaping an abusive relationship takes incredible strength and courage. This isn't brilliant, but your life will be so much better over the next year, driving licence or not. If you read threads on here people miss their licence for a bit, but it soon becomes routine to do without, there are a lot of options out there, pushbike, public transport, lifts from friends. A surprising amount of journeys are actually quicker or about same time without a car as you are no longer stuck in traffic burning expensive petrol.

 

[Sillylivvy]

Thank you for your reply. I was on the same road that my partner lived on. I drove down the road realises I shouldn’t have driven and turned around. Just unfortunately I hit the kerb and someone called the police.
I am so upset.
Just really worried about court.
I have a solicitor friend who is working on the case for me now and will represent me in court.
The police are aware of the issues with my partner but I am scared so on my interview I just said we had a fight and he threw me out. I didn’t go any further as so worried about what he will do if the police get involved.
People talk about a community order- will that affect me?
Thanks.