weegee.24
Member
Hi, need some advice/talk to people.
I was at my boyfriend's friends house Saturday just passed and was drinking alot. Me and my boyfriend had a rough time at the start of the week and was really angry with him. There was arguments, I was an emotional mess and I got a taxi home and left him there and for some reason decided I could get in the car and drive to get him as I just wanted him home. Next minute I'm driving and wasn't anywhere near the friends house but I crashed my car.
Next minute I'm at the side of the road with people helping me and police are there to say I've crashed my car and it's flipped. Because my airbags have went off it's an automatic write off. They asked if I had been drinking to which I admitted and they also asked there was drugs. I got a swab of my mouth and they were trying to find a breathiliser that was working and they found one and said I was over. I didn't deny anything and said I can vaguely remember drugs being on a table( I was in shock and couldn't piece anything together)
I got taken to hospital to get checked over but they didn't take me to the cells cause they said I was (decent) and was making any hassle for them. I kept asking if I was going to jail to which they said no but I'm now panicking incase I am. I wasn't aware of what the reading was for the breathiliser. They did read out that I was being charged/arrested I couldn't remember I couldn't stop crying. I had to wait for someone to come and take bloods and they've told me to wait for the results and then it will go to court.
I am fully aware of what I've done. I did tell them I have bipolar type 2 but have recently been told I've been missed diagnosed and potentially have emotional instability personality and that I had my mental health had been messy in the passed week. I am not looking for sympathy I just need someone to talk to. I'm scared, ashamed and embarrassed. My stepmum is in the police and she said it's my first offence so a fine and a ban. I've also had to call my insurance aswell as finance company to tell them and she's mostly worried about the financial repercussions of it all on me. I haven't told my mum or anyone else I tested positive for cocaine and that my car flipped cause telling them was hard enough. My daughter lives with her dad as I was mentally ill a few years ago and moved away to get better and thought it was in her best interest to live with her dad as she is settled in school. She recently told me she wants to live with us.
I feel I've ruined my life. My ex will love the fact this is happening as he already said he doesn't want her living with me and would do anything to get her away from me. I feel sorry for her, for my family and my boyfriend. He's been amazing and comforting and emotionally supportive but he feels guilty because of the reason I was arguing with him( caught him looking at adult sites when he was drunk)
I know it's no excuse but I've got my own issues and it's already been stated from psychiatrist that I cannot cope when things happen and alcohol doesn't help but I end up drowning my sorrows.
I don't know what to do...my cars written off..my insurance will more than likely not pay ..I'm supposed to be starting a new job this week but just told them I've been in an accident and they've been great but now I'm worried I'll get the sack once I've got convicted. My stepmum told me to take the driving course they offer which I definitely will but she thinks it will be a 12 month ban but I think either longer and possibly I'm thinking jail. I'm so scared can someone please help. I feel so low. I also mentioned to the police briefly and to my boyfriend that I did "just want to die" and I had contemplated suicide that night but they asked questions later and I said no.
Someone please help I'm hanging on my a fingernail here to keep myself sane enough.
I was at my boyfriend's friends house Saturday just passed and was drinking alot. Me and my boyfriend had a rough time at the start of the week and was really angry with him. There was arguments, I was an emotional mess and I got a taxi home and left him there and for some reason decided I could get in the car and drive to get him as I just wanted him home. Next minute I'm driving and wasn't anywhere near the friends house but I crashed my car.
Next minute I'm at the side of the road with people helping me and police are there to say I've crashed my car and it's flipped. Because my airbags have went off it's an automatic write off. They asked if I had been drinking to which I admitted and they also asked there was drugs. I got a swab of my mouth and they were trying to find a breathiliser that was working and they found one and said I was over. I didn't deny anything and said I can vaguely remember drugs being on a table( I was in shock and couldn't piece anything together)
I got taken to hospital to get checked over but they didn't take me to the cells cause they said I was (decent) and was making any hassle for them. I kept asking if I was going to jail to which they said no but I'm now panicking incase I am. I wasn't aware of what the reading was for the breathiliser. They did read out that I was being charged/arrested I couldn't remember I couldn't stop crying. I had to wait for someone to come and take bloods and they've told me to wait for the results and then it will go to court.
I am fully aware of what I've done. I did tell them I have bipolar type 2 but have recently been told I've been missed diagnosed and potentially have emotional instability personality and that I had my mental health had been messy in the passed week. I am not looking for sympathy I just need someone to talk to. I'm scared, ashamed and embarrassed. My stepmum is in the police and she said it's my first offence so a fine and a ban. I've also had to call my insurance aswell as finance company to tell them and she's mostly worried about the financial repercussions of it all on me. I haven't told my mum or anyone else I tested positive for cocaine and that my car flipped cause telling them was hard enough. My daughter lives with her dad as I was mentally ill a few years ago and moved away to get better and thought it was in her best interest to live with her dad as she is settled in school. She recently told me she wants to live with us.
I feel I've ruined my life. My ex will love the fact this is happening as he already said he doesn't want her living with me and would do anything to get her away from me. I feel sorry for her, for my family and my boyfriend. He's been amazing and comforting and emotionally supportive but he feels guilty because of the reason I was arguing with him( caught him looking at adult sites when he was drunk)
I know it's no excuse but I've got my own issues and it's already been stated from psychiatrist that I cannot cope when things happen and alcohol doesn't help but I end up drowning my sorrows.
I don't know what to do...my cars written off..my insurance will more than likely not pay ..I'm supposed to be starting a new job this week but just told them I've been in an accident and they've been great but now I'm worried I'll get the sack once I've got convicted. My stepmum told me to take the driving course they offer which I definitely will but she thinks it will be a 12 month ban but I think either longer and possibly I'm thinking jail. I'm so scared can someone please help. I feel so low. I also mentioned to the police briefly and to my boyfriend that I did "just want to die" and I had contemplated suicide that night but they asked questions later and I said no.
Someone please help I'm hanging on my a fingernail here to keep myself sane enough.