life after the ban

Convicted Driver Insurance

ellen1

Member
guys, i just want to know how you cope with the ban. I am really straggling. I have got about 15 months to go. I am a high risk offender, cause blew 114 at the station. Even though never had anything like this before and all was a stupid mistake. I have done 60 hours community service, and also the drink driving course, but it still feels like my punishment hasn't even started yet. the worst thing is the ban. it takes me now around 1.45 to get to work, as oppose to 30 min in the car. But its not just the transport that I hate. I have lost my confidence, my independence, all i want to do is to lock myself in the house and never come out, but I have to, as I am on my own and need to pay mortgage and bills. I am dreading winter, it is going to be dark and cold at the time i'll leave for work. Just wanted to find somebody who is in the same position, so we can support each other and exchange experience.... I know it may be stupid, lol, but really I don't know how to go on, so looking for any possible ways...
 
Hi Ellen,:)
You are not alone here, alot of people are alot worse off than you. It has cost me about 15 grand over the last 9 months employing somenoe to drive for me.
It has felt like I have lost a arm over the last nine months every hour I have been reminded of it by having a driver
Try to look on the positive side of things you are able to pay the mortgage and the kids still have a ro.of over there heads.
Im not going to say it will fly by and you'll be over it sooner than you think.
It will be the longest few months of your life but believe it or not there is a end, just feels so bloody far away, trust me, try not too wish away the months and keep going as normal.
Good luck.
 
why r u employing a driver? r u rich beyond believe? trust me i thought about the taxies. if u can employ the driver then u r not in the same boat as me. i appreciate u replying my thread, but u have no idea how hard it is for us, the ordinary people. u rich ppl get this drink driving ban and u get a driver, or u go to some other country for an amount of time, so u dont even feel like u were punished. i am punished all right. and i cannot escape. even tho u had a good thing in mind but u r rubbing it in hun. good luck with ur 5k driver. u have no idea tho what i am going through now......
 
ellen1 said:
why r u employing a driver? r u rich beyond believe? trust me i thought about the taxies. if u can employ the driver then u r not in the same boat as me. i appreciate u replying my thread, but u have no idea how hard it is for us, the ordinary people. u rich ppl get this drink driving ban and u get a driver, or u go to some other country for an amount of time, so u dont even feel like u were punished. i am punished all right. and i cannot escape. even tho u had a good thing in mind but u r rubbing it in hun. good luck with ur 5k driver. u have no idea tho what i am going through now......
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No not rich beyond belief, white van man.

Was trying to offer some advice

Get over yourself, life goes on, remain positive and dont be bitter.
:) :) :) :)
 
thanks for the reply. sorry, it's just i am very very stressed. in the last 3 days the area where I work has decided to cut out the bus service for 3 days, because of some roadworks. so, they have cut out the whole town out of their route. you'd have to walk half an hour to the next stop. There is only one bus that goes through it. I've suffered fro 2 days and took a day off in the end. I cannot cope with all this. I can cope with the transport and the lack of comfort, but I cannot cope with this stupidity. As it is, buses do not go where you want them to go, no direct routes, cause they think its not commercial enough.I have to take 3 buses to get to work, when it should be half an hour no more, now it takes 2 hours. yes, they have punished me, but I cannot stand how they punish people that work.If i sat on my arse, this ban would have been nothing to me. Ok, i shouldn't complain, I have put myself in this situation. some ppl might have got it worse by losing their jobs etc. But they need to think also, they want ppl to work and pay taxes and that is not taken into consideration at all. i have the same punishment that some sort of benefit scum gets... 15 months to go.... of suffering. i am counting. i don't know if i can reach it though, reach the end... i am in the end of my strength already.
 
Ellen1,
it will probably not help you with going to work, but you can ride an electric bike as a disqualified driver as you do not need a driving licence for them. They start at about £400, much more for the fancy ones but definitely better than walking.
 
Hi guys I have not been copping to well with the life after the ban .

This is my 3rd week . I was at an engagement party where I met a girl who I was keen on and had not seen her in 6 weeks we begun drinking I got a bit carried away she left with her sister I drove home . I had drunk a fair bit but to please this women I had been in the gym and lost weight so I looked amazing , problem was my tolerance had changed. I got into the car and drove ( I know , I thought I was fine ) went to a petrol station got some snacks and headed home. The petrol attendant called the old bill and they caught up with 3 mins away from my home, I had a punctured tyre and was driving on rims. I don't really remember what happened next .

I woke up in the cell thinking ,what has happened.

Then I was informed by the duty officer I had been arrested for drink drive as I blew 99 at the station.I was let go and had to go court.
i had previously 8 yrs before got done for drink drive , that was a 12month ban with the course reduced to 9 months it was easily I had lots of friends I was young.

i am now 31 and have been banned for 3yrs and have been given the course so in total have 27 months , as court was adjourned I had been asked to come back and get a pre-sentence report from probation . The probation women was great she understood how embarrassed I was about the whole thing , and how it would effect my home life driving mum around weekly shops ,appointments , also getting to work. And the any thoughts of the women forget that can't tell her , she's not interested I am 27 months of hell 777 day to be exact , have an app that counts down hrs even .

so I got 3yrs (reduced to 27months with course, 80hrs community service ) . I am so fortunate I would have accepted this the day before I went court I basically prayed for it . I have bought a bike I cycle to the gym , I gave my car to my sister and she works in the building next door to my so she drops me in the morning . God loves and he has done this to make me better it could be worse I could have hurt someone how would my life changed then . Life after the ban is already looking up , get a bike join the gym keep yourself busy keep smiling . Hope this helps anyone who reads this , I know it seems hard but we learn from our mistakes .

Ps psi there have been many things written in regards to what to do on the day of court , get a brief , get references work ,friends , pillars of the community ,and be very sorry as you are to your probation officer . I was crying my eyes out last night and had not slept . I have know told my family and will sleep well tonight for the firs time in a long time . As long as the matter is done after community service and my family love me the ban it self may be a blessing in disguise I have my bike am feeling fit and saving money . We live in a country where public transport is great we are fortunate then you may believe , someone could have got hurt , someone's family might not have there loved one around at Christmas . Be strong I am never doing it again . It will only make me stronger . Thanks for listening this forum is a great way to speak to people , I don't really talk to to many people .
 
ellen1 said:
thanks for the reply. sorry, it's just i am very very stressed. in the last 3 days the area where I work has decided to cut out the bus service for 3 days, because of some roadworks. so, they have cut out the whole town out of their route. you'd have to walk half an hour to the next stop. There is only one bus that goes through it. I've suffered fro 2 days and took a day off in the end. I cannot cope with all this. I can cope with the transport and the lack of comfort, but I cannot cope with this stupidity. As it is, buses do not go where you want them to go, no direct routes, cause they think its not commercial enough.I have to take 3 buses to get to work, when it should be half an hour no more, now it takes 2 hours. yes, they have punished me, but I cannot stand how they punish people that work.If i sat on my arse, this ban would have been nothing to me. Ok, i shouldn't complain, I have put myself in this situation. some ppl might have got it worse by losing their jobs etc. But they need to think also, they want ppl to work and pay taxes and that is not taken into consideration at all. i have the same punishment that some sort of benefit scum gets... 15 months to go.... of suffering. i am counting. i don't know if i can reach it though, reach the end... i am in the end of my strength already.
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Ellen,

Firstly, you're not alone in your 'stress' of being in this situation, albeit, putting ourselves in this situation and hence only ourselves to blame. However, I am a little bothered by your last sentence and the reference to 'benefit scum'. I now find myself in the position of HAVING to claim benefits due to my husband suffering a sudden Stroke and me having to come out of work to care for him and our children on a full-time basis, having once both worked in very decent roles, both decent earners and never NOT being out of work - does that class us as 'benefit scum' now?

The section of your text which I have highlighted is quite ironic to me, as we are the ones to blame for putting ourselves - nobody else. Of course we have to be punished, or do you believe we should not have been? I was punished in 2012 for a DR10, yet I stupidly put myself in the same position this year, and am now being punished for a further 3 years, but I blame no one but ME.

I got through my first ban by focusing on the positives; the fact I didn't kill someone when I was behind that wheel was the primary positive in my opinion, focusing on my family, my boys, started walking and losing a bit more weight etc, enjoying nature more. Now, I feel really low about the fact I am only coming up to 6 months into a 3 year ban but have to just deal with that, by again, focusing on the positives.

By looking at alternative transport routes, such as trains, buses etc. Maybe an extra half hour walk a day will be great for your health etc.?

I believe the real punishment begins when we get our license back, and realise how much insurance actually is! You may find you prefer to get the bus then, or basically have no other option but to have to, due to the car insurance premiums you will be quoted.

Unfortunately, c'est la vie, but we didn't kill or injure anybody, or ourselves so worse things could happen in life I guess.
 
Ellen,

I understand where you are coming from - I was banned for 3 years (2nd offence) in 2010, after near 2 years I was caught driving whilst disqualified outside my house. The car was removed from outside my house, whilst the neighbours looked on. For months after I felt like I was doing the walk of shame in the street going to work and coming home I felt the curtains were twitching, it happened in the summer and I could not wait for the dark nights to hide myself away from everybody. I live by myself and told no-one, not even my family. I just told anyone who asked that the car was beyond repair and I couldn't afford to get it replaced and decided to bus it to save up for another - it broke my heart looking out my front door and there was no car there !!!

I had to get 2 buses to and from work. I live 5 miles from work (as the crow fly's) but the 2 bus journeys could take up to 90 minutes. It was the small things I missed, getting my shopping, bringing the cat to the vet, going out for a drive along the coast etc... but gradually over time you have to accept that this is now your life and you must adapt and accept the change of what being disqualified brings.

I found it very difficult at times and I did get depressed and was blaming everyone but myself but over time hopefully things will get better with yourself and you will start to think positive about getting back on the road again.
 
ellen1 said:
guys, i just want to know how you cope with the ban. I am really straggling. I have got about 15 months to go. I am a high risk offender, cause blew 114 at the station. Even though never had anything like this before and all was a stupid mistake. I have done 60 hours community service, and also the drink driving course, but it still feels like my punishment hasn't even started yet. the worst thing is the ban. it takes me now around 1.45 to get to work, as oppose to 30 min in the car. But its not just the transport that I hate. I have lost my confidence, my independence, all i want to do is to lock myself in the house and never come out, but I have to, as I am on my own and need to pay mortgage and bills. I am dreading winter, it is going to be dark and cold at the time i'll leave for work. Just wanted to find somebody who is in the same position, so we can support each other and exchange experience.... I know it may be stupid, lol, but really I don't know how to go on, so looking for any possible ways...
Click to expand...

Ellen, you'll get through this, but you will need help from friends, and you're going to have to dig deep. I was lucky with the support I had, but four years later, when I Google my name and town, still the thing that comes up is my conviction. There's nothing 'lol' about it. You have to take positives where you can. No one was injured? (I assume) and you still have your job. At that point you're on to a winner. That's much more than many others have. Getting your car back doesn't make everything ok again, believe me. I know how you feel, and I know you feel ashamed, but you have to use the support from those around you to take you out of it. And that's just for the ban. Like I said four years later, and I'm back to this comforting forum just to see if there's any way I can remove this part of my past that I'd really rather forget.
 
AndyCabs its amazing, its' like you are telling my story and the way I feel. Apart from that I had lesser charge, it was my first ever offence. But it all happened near my house, so yes, I am very ashamed, I am happy that I come back home at night now. I almost run when I get close to my house now and I feel the best when I am inside and lock all the doors.. And the same thing: 20 to 30 minutes in the care to my work and now it'a about 90 minutes or more, I have to take 2 or sometimes 3 buses. I am so glad it is over for you. it's 14 month to go for me. I feel sometimes that I am losing my will to live, well actually I have lost it already. I find it very, very difficult to cope. the only way is to switch off and try to be a some sort of robot.
 
Hi stupidgirl, thank you for your support. No, by no means I meant anything bad about the benefit system in your situation. I am sure you understand. I mean the people that abuse it, they get it easy in any case. they get sweet fa, any punishment is nothing for them. But you have your responsibilities, so you do feel the punishment just as much as I am.
I don't care about insurance that much, so it will go up twice, so its' £40 to £60 it's fine if I can my life and my time back.it's a small price to pay for the independence and time.
thank you for your advice about positive things. but the thing is I don't actually benefit from walking, the bus stops are not fare, but it's just waiting, waiting and waiting, going the stupid routes with the worst traffic ever. I am not a nob and I am ok swapping the comfort of my car and share my journey in a crowded bus, But it's just time, time that i miss. Seeing my kid so much later at night, not being able to hop in a car and just go anywhere with him, being limited to everything, time is so much more than money.
 
Hi anotherisllyfool, i wrote a reply to u , but it got deleted somehow, so i'll write a shorter one. what i can't undertand how u r getting your name on google along with your conviction. I don't get it (thank god!) but you know you hae a right for privacy and its a new law. do write to google to ask that removed.
 
ellen1,

I agree with you. Not being able to drive sucks the life out of you. In my case I've been banned without even having committed a drink drive offence. So I feel doubly aggrieved!! I've written a separate post about that.

In my case, I live in a rural area and getting to the shops is a real challenge. I'm looking at getting an electric bike whilst I engage in the to and fro with DVLA.

It's not a perfect solution especially with winter coming up, but it gives a certain amount of freedom.

Pete
 
Hi guys, i am just coming here for support. I have now about 11 months left. it is awful. still struggling with the buses. have to take at least 3 buses to get to work. I am kinda used to it now. Every night i am counting my luck: so the first bus came its lucky, so i caught the 2nd bus its also lucky, mb i will be home before 7 pm. but then the 3rd bus doesn't meet my expectation. and i come home late again. gotta cook dinner and then go to sleep. I understand they had to impose this sentence on me, but its just too much. i could cope with 12 month reduced to 9, but because i had a high reading i have more now. 11 months left. it is my fault but do they actually know how it feels? i am a working person and i suffer from depression. despite that i still work, pay my taxes. i go to a therapist and she helps me a lot, but what happened to me and the brutality of the punishment does not help. I am just giving up hope. My therapist said i have given up on life. and yet they want u to work and pay taxes.
 
Hi,

Ive now not had my driving license for 5 years for insurance purposes and it has indeed been incredibly difficult.

Best advice I can give you is stick at it. There is an end game in all of this and it essentially is being given back your freedom so don't loose focus of that. Nothing else is really that important when you boil it down. Your not alone though and this forum has helped me a lot. I'm currently going through the process of getting mine back and can't wait to drive to work again and have a large part of my life back!

Keep going !!
 
stupidgirl said:
Ellen,

Firstly, you're not alone in your 'stress' of being in this situation, albeit, putting ourselves in this situation and hence only ourselves to blame. However, I am a little bothered by your last sentence and the reference to 'benefit scum'. I now find myself in the position of HAVING to claim benefits due to my husband suffering a sudden Stroke and me having to come out of work to care for him and our children on a full-time basis, having once both worked in very decent roles, both decent earners and never NOT being out of work - does that class us as 'benefit scum' now?

The section of your text which I have highlighted is quite ironic to me, as we are the ones to blame for putting ourselves - nobody else. Of course we have to be punished, or do you believe we should not have been? I was punished in 2012 for a DR10, yet I stupidly put myself in the same position this year, and am now being punished for a further 3 years, but I blame no one but ME.

I got through my first ban by focusing on the positives; the fact I didn't kill someone when I was behind that wheel was the primary positive in my opinion, focusing on my family, my boys, started walking and losing a bit more weight etc, enjoying nature more. Now, I feel really low about the fact I am only coming up to 6 months into a 3 year ban but have to just deal with that, by again, focusing on the positives.

By looking at alternative transport routes, such as trains, buses etc. Maybe an extra half hour walk a day will be great for your health etc.?

I believe the real punishment begins when we get our license back, and realise how much insurance actually is! You may find you prefer to get the bus then, or basically have no other option but to have to, due to the car insurance premiums you will be quoted.


Unfortunately, c'est la vie, but we didn't kill or injure anybody, or ourselves so worse things could happen in life I guess.
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oh is awful what you have been through i feel the same i am awaiting trial on the 17th of this monthi have a spent conviction for/dd and also drunk in charge of a car then got done just before xmas i now think my life has come to an end i lost all last year through/d/d my home my family now i live with my mum and yeah i get the bus to work
 
Sambeckett12345 said:
Hi guys I have not been copping to well with the life after the ban .

This is my 3rd week . I was at an engagement party where I met a girl who I was keen on and had not seen her in 6 weeks we begun drinking I got a bit carried away she left with her sister I drove home . I had drunk a fair bit but to please this women I had been in the gym and lost weight so I looked amazing , problem was my tolerance had changed. I got into the car and drove ( I know , I thought I was fine ) went to a petrol station got some snacks and headed home. The petrol attendant called the old bill and they caught up with 3 mins away from my home, I had a punctured tyre and was driving on rims. I don't really remember what happened next .

I woke up in the cell thinking ,what has happened.

Then I was informed by the duty officer I had been arrested for drink drive as I blew 99 at the station.I was let go and had to go court.
i had previously 8 yrs before got done for drink drive , that was a 12month ban with the course reduced to 9 months it was easily I had lots of friends I was young.

i am now 31 and have been banned for 3yrs and have been given the course so in total have 27 months , as court was adjourned I had been asked to come back and get a pre-sentence report from probation . The probation women was great she understood how embarrassed I was about the whole thing , and how it would effect my home life driving mum around weekly shops ,appointments , also getting to work. And the any thoughts of the women forget that can't tell her , she's not interested I am 27 months of hell 777 day to be exact , have an app that counts down hrs even .

so I got 3yrs (reduced to 27months with course, 80hrs community service ) . I am so fortunate I would have accepted this the day before I went court I basically prayed for it . I have bought a bike I cycle to the gym , I gave my car to my sister and she works in the building next door to my so she drops me in the morning . God loves and he has done this to make me better it could be worse I could have hurt someone how would my life changed then . Life after the ban is already looking up , get a bike join the gym keep yourself busy keep smiling . Hope this helps anyone who reads this , I know it seems hard but we learn from our mistakes .

Ps psi there have been many things written in regards to what to do on the day of court , get a brief , get references work ,friends , pillars of the community ,and be very sorry as you are to your probation officer . I was crying my eyes out last night and had not slept . I have know told my family and will sleep well tonight for the firs time in a long time . As long as the matter is done after community service and my family love me the ban it self may be a blessing in disguise I have my bike am feeling fit and saving money . We live in a country where public transport is great we are fortunate then you may believe , someone could have got hurt , someone's family might not have there loved one around at Christmas . Be strong I am never doing it again . It will only make me stronger . Thanks for listening this forum is a great way to speak to people , I don't really talk to to many people .
Click to expand...


I just wanted to say what an amazing statement!!!!!!! My ban only began in Jan 2015 18 months with the completion of the DD course. You have such an amazing attitude. It is about accepting things you cannot change and turning all this bad ness into a positive. I have embraced my ban, declined lifts and snubbed public transport! Walking I have met so many people, even witnessed a crime
 
ellen1 said:
guys, i just want to know how you cope with the ban. I am really straggling. I have got about 15 months to go. I am a high risk offender, cause blew 114 at the station. Even though never had anything like this before and all was a stupid mistake. I have done 60 hours community service, and also the drink driving course, but it still feels like my punishment hasn't even started yet. the worst thing is the ban. it takes me now around 1.45 to get to work, as oppose to 30 min in the car. But its not just the transport that I hate. I have lost my confidence, my independence, all i want to do is to lock myself in the house and never come out, but I have to, as I am on my own and need to pay mortgage and bills. I am dreading winter, it is going to be dark and cold at the time i'll leave for work. Just wanted to find somebody who is in the same position, so we can support each other and exchange experience.... I know it may be stupid, lol, but really I don't know how to go on, so looking for any possible ways...
Click to expand...

I'm 12 months in, 6 to go, accepted it or just used to my new life. so much. has changed since I last drove, have I missed it, yeah in a way, but learnt my lesson big time. things will never be the same X
 
Look, I'll be totally honest with you guys.
Have I learn my lesson about drinking a driving? yes, certainly. And even "the day after", no I am totally aware, I will not be driving.
Have I turned it into something positive? somewhat, see above.
Have I embraced my ban and turned it into something positive? no.
Do I now enjoy walking to work? no, it will roughly take me 6 hours to walk to work. ( I estimate)
Do i enjoy cycling to work? no, I am not a good cyclist and it is not safe to cycle where I work even for a very good cyclist, and I don't like it anyway.
Have I embraced the public transport with joy? No, and sometimes I wanted to cry, and I did, as the other day the total of just waiting for buses took me 1 hour, just waiting. so total journey home - 2 hours as opposed to 30 min in a car.
When i get my car in a month (hopefully) I'll make sure i'll never use that horrible way of travelling ever again.
Maybe the positive is that i have learned to block everything, by sticking headphones in my ears and playing games on my phone non stop, so I do not go insane, I just block most of my sensors on my way to work and back, switch off, I panic if my battery is going dead. So, yes, if they wanted to punish me, they really did, and I have learned from it. Maybe this is positive. But this is also a punishment. You don't just wake up in prison and think : wow, this is good! And this is how I feel. It has actually deepened my depression a lot. I am struggling. And even if it is all coming to an end, this is not the end for me. I am now scared to drive, due to a long break, I need to sort out a new car and an insurance. So, this is not the end. But i'll do anything, absolutely anything to end this situation. It is sad though, that they have to make it so bad with public transport that it drives people insane, just like prison. Certain places are out of bound for me, like for example a local Tesco, - nothing goes there, I haven't been there since I was banned, just ordering on line. And I don't even live in some remote territories, just greater London.
 
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